BUT HE'S CORRECT ABOUT THAT and Wei Wuxian gives him a sympathetic look. Junpei... is already the kind of guy who carries a lot on his shoulders, so. Wei Wuxian is pretty concerned about how he's holding up under this much pressure. He gives Cinnabun a little cuddle, like it's a proxy for Junpei.]
Hah, I can understand that, at least a little. [Wei Wuxian, constantly like "why can't I tell people I am murdering".] Though I'm sure it's much more frustrating when the things you could tell us could potentially help us solve some of our current problems.
It was sort of like that on the ship, too. Even when I did finally tell everyone everything I knew, the demons tried to punish me. [false evidence shit. fuck you demons. but...there's something a little odd in his features.] But your job is just as hard, I think, even...if it's necessary.
[10/10 he loves Cinnabun, one of his favorite campers to this day.]
Mmmhm. [FUCK YOU DEMONS!! Wei Wuxian will never stop being Mr. Crocker about demons which is a terrible look for the grandmaster of demonic cultivation.] Though I suppose those risks are necessary sometimes, to push forward. [Thinkin about Giyuu's wholeass arm and maybe wondering about the necessity of some risks........
Anyway, he just huff-laughs, shoulders raising.]
Can't complain too much. It's better this way. [As he'll tell Wen Ning, it allows him to keep other people from having to go through this, for as long as he manages to stay alive. There's a little quirking smile, then.] What's that look for, friend?
Even if it's better this way and I agree that risks are necessary, that doesn't mean I'm not worried about you, dumbass. [please don't call your friends dumbasses, junpei, that's rude.] It's...having been in your position before, it's not great.
[No please call at least this friend a dumbass because that is 100% what he IS.
Anyway Wei Wuxian's going to be doing better through sheer willpower because Beau is losing her entire mind despite the depression void he gets to deal with, so at least he is no longer a step away from a mental snap. He even grins his usual goblin grin Junpei's way...]
Ah! It warms my heart to hear you talk like that, Junpei! [TOUCHES A HAND TO HIS CHEST DRAMATICALLY. And beneath the gremlin dramatics, he really is grateful... Terrible. Anyway Junpei is right, it is not great, and he wants to provide some non-teasing comfort and commiseration. But the catch-22 with that is that he'd have to reveal how upset he is?? Nyet.]
Hah - well, we can be miserable together for another week, then. Just leave my eerie statue something nice whenever I go and come say hello to me when it's your turn on the other side, mm? I miss being able to pester you and see your horrible little face every day.
[i'm crying at how far the ghosts have spiraled, please save them. but also, like, yeah. it's not like he was expecting wei wuxian to actually explain that he was upset or anything or even be honest how he feels because they're the same brand of shithead who just powers through everything for the sake of other people and assuming they don't deserve forgiveness for stuff. it's cool.
and...given, well, the part where he can sort of see how things have gone he understands enough. it's why he just gives him a flat look instead.]
I really ought to summon something to throw at your gremlin face right now. [FRIENDSHIP...? but he glances at the ceiling instead.] But in that case...[give him a second, and he'll wave his cape to reach inside and pull out a bottle of rice wine!
...it's the same kind of wine that wei wuxian left at the bar for the fucking oujia board. and there's also a chocolate cupcake with edible glitter.] What do you think? Too early in the day to drink to being miserable together for another week?
[SOMETIMES EVERYTHING JUST COMES AT YA FAST. It's fine he's still doing better than Beau... Terrible that they vibe on such a high level, though. Honestly they are the worst type of gremlin, just sitting here in their mutual shared suffering without actually sharing it.]
Be kind to me! Don't bully me! I'm your elder, you know! [RESPECT YOUR ELDERS JUNPEI!!
Anyway he just blinks for a second and then squints.]
...Was that you. [Jack........... But he sighs either way and stands up, Cinnabun in tow, to meander over.] And is it ever too early to drink to being miserable together for another week? Or to drink at all?
I kind of feel like you're bullying me though? Just saying. but there's a smug little grin as he also pulls out two cups to pour drinks for both of them...and nods.]
Jack was close enough to Junpei that I let Akira run with it. Figured it'd be the last time I could talk to you guys mostly as myself for a while. [he considers that last question though and shakes his head.] Good point though. It's definitely never too early.
I'm not! I'm being very kind to you, actually. Don't you know how generous I am?
[SIGHS!! But he will take one of those drinks when Junpei is done pouring, taking a sip instead of tanking for once to savor it.
And after that he SIGHS AGAIN, BUT LOUDER.]
Aiyo... No wonder I liked that silly board so much. [Terrible.] I should have left you a better offering! Though I do quite like rice wine, and the cupcakes are cute.
[a beat.] Yeah. Obviously I do. [it's a touch too sincere but once he pours himself a cup he lifts it in a toast before taking a sip himself.]
The offering wasn't bad but it was more the thought that counted anyway. Not like I could've actually grabbed it from where I was since I wasn't on that bus with you.
[Oh no, sincerity... Wei Wuxian's smile softens just a bit.]
Hah - now you're being too kind! [HE'S GONNA HAVE TO BEAT JUNPEI UP.]
But that's true, that's true. I did quite enjoy talking to you even then, even for that little while. I felt quite bad, though! The idea of some sort of spirit being stuck in that bus forever made me tired.
Lucky for both of us, I am not actually a bus and I don't have to use the board to communicate anymore. [is he bypassing the comment about being too kind? it's more likely than you think.] But...y'know. We all came here by bus, so it sort of made sense.
[He'd reach out to pat Junpei, but he is still cradling Cinnabun in one arm and would have to put down his drink to do that. Junpei just gets a faux-sympathetic look.]
True, true - I'm sure even a few minutes pretending to be a ghost trapped in a bus would have been hard, though! --Ah, did you come by the same bus, though? Before any of us, then? How exactly did all of that work, anyway? If you can say, of course.
...it was different than the bus you guys were on, but similar. Or maybe it was the same and it's been making multiple trips, I don't know. But it's not like I was alone. Just...some of you guys were missing.
Oh - I hate that. [HE HATES TIME SHENANIGANS. This time he drinks like half of his glass in one go, god. If only he could get drunk.]
Well... I bet you miss the quiet a little now, with all of us constantly knocking at your door, barging into your office, breaking into your cabin, reading your diary, so on.
[No kill him first he's less important than a director.]
Ah... [He sets his glass down so he can hold Cinnabun with both hands, gently holding her up and brushing her fuzzy little bun mane against Junpei's nose.] You don't seem to do well anyway, being alone.
[thanks wei wuxian. this is why he's the emotional support gremlin. and also because, like, junpei could lie and brush that off but somehow wwx has become a person who tends to be on the receiving end of junpei's squishy human emotions. so...he huffs a little at the noseboop from his bun's fur.]
Was it that obvious? I'm not so bad at being independent.
But he unfortunately loves Junpei and Junpei's squishy human emotions alike, for all the good and bad there is in them. He settles Cinnabun into the crook of his arms and hums, considering.]
Mm, you're not! You've made it a long way being independent, and there's certainly merit to it. But the isolation in independence is unpleasant, sometimes. It's hard to be by yourself.
[He says it simply, but hilariously, this is also probably the most blunt he's ever been about being alone, too.]
You're not wrong. [but his gaze seems to land on cinnabun, sort of unfocused. he's not sure if he wants to continue, but at the same time...]
Then again, sometimes I think it's just as hard to be with other people after being alone for so long, so what do I know? [namely in the sense that you don't know what to trust with people after all this time.] Most of the time I like that people are here even with these shitty circumstances.
Maybe I don't really know how to feel about anything anymore, actually.
[Sometimes you just have to have a heart-to-heart with a gremlin. He scritches the ruff of Cinnabun's fluffy neck, humming again in a softer, more lilting way.]
Pretty normal after everything you've been through, I'd say. Being alone is hard! Being around people is hard, too. Being alive in general is terrible sometimes, haha. [HAHA. Return him to the dirt.]
But I'm glad you don't have to be alone anymore, here. [...] Relatively speaking. You can be surrounded by people and still feel isolated, after all, especially in a position like yours.
Being alive is actually awful sometimes, yeah. Especially when you remember dying enough. [he'll just come out and say it because haha, sometimes. shit sucks! and dick gets weird if he says things like that soooo...he doesn't, often.]
...it's similar, isn't it? [he doesn't clarify that he means it's similar for him and wei wuxian, but figures he'll leave it openended so he can answer or not. also haha this is even before the rules get out so this is a funny conversation suddenly.] I guess it's just because there're people who try to stick around anyway.
Also hate that they can just make TERRIBLE REFERENCES TO DYING. Just volley that shit back and forward. He grins; a lopsided thing, with a little sharpness to the humor's edge.]
Mm, the more you have under your belt, the more awful it can be? [A little huff of a laugh.
But, since Junpei's decided to put it down, he'll pick it up.] Hah - seems like it. [Even if it's a small acknowledgment... Anyway he doesn't need a rulebook to know being an NPC sucks okay HE HEARD CHUUYA COMPLAIN ENOUGH. There is some terrible gremlin affection in his little goblin expression at that, too.]
Unfortunately, a lot of us stick like burrs! Can't shake us off even if you try.
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BUT HE'S CORRECT ABOUT THAT and Wei Wuxian gives him a sympathetic look. Junpei... is already the kind of guy who carries a lot on his shoulders, so. Wei Wuxian is pretty concerned about how he's holding up under this much pressure. He gives Cinnabun a little cuddle, like it's a proxy for Junpei.]
Hah, I can understand that, at least a little. [Wei Wuxian, constantly like "why can't I tell people I am murdering".] Though I'm sure it's much more frustrating when the things you could tell us could potentially help us solve some of our current problems.
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It was sort of like that on the ship, too. Even when I did finally tell everyone everything I knew, the demons tried to punish me. [false evidence shit. fuck you demons. but...there's something a little odd in his features.] But your job is just as hard, I think, even...if it's necessary.
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Mmmhm. [FUCK YOU DEMONS!! Wei Wuxian will never stop being Mr. Crocker about demons which is a terrible look for the grandmaster of demonic cultivation.] Though I suppose those risks are necessary sometimes, to push forward. [Thinkin about Giyuu's wholeass arm and maybe wondering about the necessity of some risks........
Anyway, he just huff-laughs, shoulders raising.]
Can't complain too much. It's better this way. [As he'll tell Wen Ning, it allows him to keep other people from having to go through this, for as long as he manages to stay alive. There's a little quirking smile, then.] What's that look for, friend?
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Even if it's better this way and I agree that risks are necessary, that doesn't mean I'm not worried about you, dumbass. [please don't call your friends dumbasses, junpei, that's rude.] It's...having been in your position before, it's not great.
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Anyway Wei Wuxian's going to be doing better through sheer willpower because Beau is losing her entire mind despite the depression void he gets to deal with, so at least he is no longer a step away from a mental snap. He even grins his usual goblin grin Junpei's way...]
Ah! It warms my heart to hear you talk like that, Junpei! [TOUCHES A HAND TO HIS CHEST DRAMATICALLY. And beneath the gremlin dramatics, he really is grateful... Terrible. Anyway Junpei is right, it is not great, and he wants to provide some non-teasing comfort and commiseration. But the catch-22 with that is that he'd have to reveal how upset he is?? Nyet.]
Hah - well, we can be miserable together for another week, then. Just leave my eerie statue something nice whenever I go and come say hello to me when it's your turn on the other side, mm? I miss being able to pester you and see your horrible little face every day.
[HE SAYS, SO FONDLY.]
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and...given, well, the part where he can sort of see how things have gone he understands enough. it's why he just gives him a flat look instead.]
I really ought to summon something to throw at your gremlin face right now. [FRIENDSHIP...? but he glances at the ceiling instead.] But in that case...[give him a second, and he'll wave his cape to reach inside and pull out a bottle of rice wine!
...it's the same kind of wine that wei wuxian left at the bar for the fucking oujia board. and there's also a chocolate cupcake with edible glitter.] What do you think? Too early in the day to drink to being miserable together for another week?
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Be kind to me! Don't bully me! I'm your elder, you know! [RESPECT YOUR ELDERS JUNPEI!!
Anyway he just blinks for a second and then squints.]
...Was that you. [Jack........... But he sighs either way and stands up, Cinnabun in tow, to meander over.] And is it ever too early to drink to being miserable together for another week? Or to drink at all?
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Jack was close enough to Junpei that I let Akira run with it. Figured it'd be the last time I could talk to you guys mostly as myself for a while. [he considers that last question though and shakes his head.] Good point though. It's definitely never too early.
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[SIGHS!! But he will take one of those drinks when Junpei is done pouring, taking a sip instead of tanking for once to savor it.
And after that he SIGHS AGAIN, BUT LOUDER.]
Aiyo... No wonder I liked that silly board so much. [Terrible.] I should have left you a better offering! Though I do quite like rice wine, and the cupcakes are cute.
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The offering wasn't bad but it was more the thought that counted anyway. Not like I could've actually grabbed it from where I was since I wasn't on that bus with you.
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Hah - now you're being too kind! [HE'S GONNA HAVE TO BEAT JUNPEI UP.]
But that's true, that's true. I did quite enjoy talking to you even then, even for that little while. I felt quite bad, though! The idea of some sort of spirit being stuck in that bus forever made me tired.
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True, true - I'm sure even a few minutes pretending to be a ghost trapped in a bus would have been hard, though! --Ah, did you come by the same bus, though? Before any of us, then? How exactly did all of that work, anyway? If you can say, of course.
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[Wow what a bad bus ride.]
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Well... I bet you miss the quiet a little now, with all of us constantly knocking at your door, barging into your office, breaking into your cabin, reading your diary, so on.
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...you'd think so but the quiet was actually really...not great. I'd rather deal with everyone else even if some of the others are a pain in the ass.
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Ah... [He sets his glass down so he can hold Cinnabun with both hands, gently holding her up and brushing her fuzzy little bun mane against Junpei's nose.] You don't seem to do well anyway, being alone.
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Was it that obvious? I'm not so bad at being independent.
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But he unfortunately loves Junpei and Junpei's squishy human emotions alike, for all the good and bad there is in them. He settles Cinnabun into the crook of his arms and hums, considering.]
Mm, you're not! You've made it a long way being independent, and there's certainly merit to it. But the isolation in independence is unpleasant, sometimes. It's hard to be by yourself.
[He says it simply, but hilariously, this is also probably the most blunt he's ever been about being alone, too.]
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Then again, sometimes I think it's just as hard to be with other people after being alone for so long, so what do I know? [namely in the sense that you don't know what to trust with people after all this time.] Most of the time I like that people are here even with these shitty circumstances.
Maybe I don't really know how to feel about anything anymore, actually.
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Pretty normal after everything you've been through, I'd say. Being alone is hard! Being around people is hard, too. Being alive in general is terrible sometimes, haha. [HAHA. Return him to the dirt.]
But I'm glad you don't have to be alone anymore, here. [...] Relatively speaking. You can be surrounded by people and still feel isolated, after all, especially in a position like yours.
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Being alive is actually awful sometimes, yeah. Especially when you remember dying enough. [he'll just come out and say it because haha, sometimes. shit sucks! and dick gets weird if he says things like that soooo...he doesn't, often.]
...it's similar, isn't it? [he doesn't clarify that he means it's similar for him and wei wuxian, but figures he'll leave it openended so he can answer or not. also haha this is even before the rules get out so this is a funny conversation suddenly.] I guess it's just because there're people who try to stick around anyway.
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Also hate that they can just make TERRIBLE REFERENCES TO DYING. Just volley that shit back and forward. He grins; a lopsided thing, with a little sharpness to the humor's edge.]
Mm, the more you have under your belt, the more awful it can be? [A little huff of a laugh.
But, since Junpei's decided to put it down, he'll pick it up.] Hah - seems like it. [Even if it's a small acknowledgment... Anyway he doesn't need a rulebook to know being an NPC sucks okay HE HEARD CHUUYA COMPLAIN ENOUGH. There is some terrible gremlin affection in his little goblin expression at that, too.]
Unfortunately, a lot of us stick like burrs! Can't shake us off even if you try.
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