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[HELLO? AGAIN? It’s fine.
Taako is here, he’s in a cute break in outfit, it’s probably tie-dye. That’s all you need to know. He’s brought his associated inventory, but the flamethrower, as always, is kind of an accessory?
He pauses, digging in his fanny pack for a second before unfolding a piece of construction paper. On it, in beautiful glitter pen, is his signature.]
Hold on, I think— I’m a celebrity, they’ll let me in.
[Then he slides the paper under the door.]
Taako is here, he’s in a cute break in outfit, it’s probably tie-dye. That’s all you need to know. He’s brought his associated inventory, but the flamethrower, as always, is kind of an accessory?
He pauses, digging in his fanny pack for a second before unfolding a piece of construction paper. On it, in beautiful glitter pen, is his signature.]
Hold on, I think— I’m a celebrity, they’ll let me in.
[Then he slides the paper under the door.]
I'd be really amazed if the paper thing worked.
[ But Escha does give Magnus plenty of time to work at the lock. That seems like the smartest way in - that seems like the thing that would work!
But then
after a while
she gets bored. And taps Magnus on the shoulder to nudge him out of the way before slamming her staff into the door as hard as she can. ]
[ But Escha does give Magnus plenty of time to work at the lock. That seems like the smartest way in - that seems like the thing that would work!
But then
after a while
she gets bored. And taps Magnus on the shoulder to nudge him out of the way before slamming her staff into the door as hard as she can. ]
[Escha slams her staff into the door...
And where the lockpicking and autograph failed, the door seems to give in! It swings open for them, and after they've all entered (with some complaining from Taako's end), the door slams shut behind them.
They aren't in the dark, though. This area is a grand, antique looking foyer, with three large, ornate oak doors ahead of them. The carpet beneath their feet is plush, muffling their footsteps, and the stone walls stretch high up above them to a skylight that must be several stories above them. Lining the walls are all sorts of books and tomes, all dusty and aging-- they may each remove one, if they choose to.
The doors each have a plaque hanging above them. To the left is one with the word HORROR scratched into its surface. In the middle is one that says ROMANCE in flowing cursive script. On their right, the final door is labeled SCIENCE FICTION in a digital-style font.
What do they do first?]
And where the lockpicking and autograph failed, the door seems to give in! It swings open for them, and after they've all entered (with some complaining from Taako's end), the door slams shut behind them.
They aren't in the dark, though. This area is a grand, antique looking foyer, with three large, ornate oak doors ahead of them. The carpet beneath their feet is plush, muffling their footsteps, and the stone walls stretch high up above them to a skylight that must be several stories above them. Lining the walls are all sorts of books and tomes, all dusty and aging-- they may each remove one, if they choose to.
The doors each have a plaque hanging above them. To the left is one with the word HORROR scratched into its surface. In the middle is one that says ROMANCE in flowing cursive script. On their right, the final door is labeled SCIENCE FICTION in a digital-style font.
What do they do first?]
[ . . . hm.
Taako will look at a book, yeah - Here’s on that seems familiar? ‘7 Habits For Highly Effective Elves‘? flipping through, but after a second he’ll look at each plaque.]
Horror? Fuck no. Romance. Uh. Sci-fi . . . ?
Taako will look at a book, yeah - Here’s on that seems familiar? ‘7 Habits For Highly Effective Elves‘? flipping through, but after a second he’ll look at each plaque.]
Horror? Fuck no. Romance. Uh. Sci-fi . . . ?
Edited 2020-07-08 02:55 (UTC)
[ Escha also plucks a book off the shelf. It's... Looks around my room.... Uh, Solaris. That's not a funny joke but sometimes that's just how it be. ]
Sure, I don't mi--hey, wait up at least!
[ And she hurries after Magnus! ]
Sure, I don't mi--hey, wait up at least!
[ And she hurries after Magnus! ]
[As they pick up the books, they will each realize they know what their own book will do in a pinch. 7 Habits for Highly Effective Elves will let Taako automatically succeed at a single action. HARD WOOD: Men Pounding Thick Trunks Into Place will let Magnus pound a single object or obstacle into or out of place, destroying it or maybe in some cases fixing it. Solaris will let Escha create a brief flare of light in a room that will blind and disorient anyone in it besides herself.
And as they enter the Sci-Fi door...]
[Welcome back to the Starblaster.... 2.
Their latest mission on the surface of Upsilon-6 was a success, and after a few close encounters with local alien wildlife in which Magnus came heroically to Taako's rescue, Taako got the locals to give them stuff, and Escha used her knowledge to warn them off of further dangers, they've returned with more information about this planet and new samples to study.
Now, it's time to return home-- if they can make it there, that is.
It seems their ship has been infiltrated by members of the Grob, an enemy hivemind that threatens to absorb all other lifeforms into itself. One of these in particular is an undercover agent intent on taking over their ship and setting it on a different course, one that undoubtedly spells doom for the rest of its crew.
Armed with their knowledge, hotness, and sweet one-liners, they will have to determine which of their crew is the traitor behind this before it's too late. It could be any one of them-- even someone they trust.
Next chapter.]
[The three of them begin together at the airlock, but they're free to take whatever actions they want to fulfill their objective and locate the traitorous crewmate! Their books are effective for this trip only. They have on them any equipment their character would reasonably own, and they have the necessary knowledge to fill their role-- but they all retain their usual memories.]
And as they enter the Sci-Fi door...]
[Welcome back to the Starblaster.... 2.
Their latest mission on the surface of Upsilon-6 was a success, and after a few close encounters with local alien wildlife in which Magnus came heroically to Taako's rescue, Taako got the locals to give them stuff, and Escha used her knowledge to warn them off of further dangers, they've returned with more information about this planet and new samples to study.
Now, it's time to return home-- if they can make it there, that is.
It seems their ship has been infiltrated by members of the Grob, an enemy hivemind that threatens to absorb all other lifeforms into itself. One of these in particular is an undercover agent intent on taking over their ship and setting it on a different course, one that undoubtedly spells doom for the rest of its crew.
Armed with their knowledge, hotness, and sweet one-liners, they will have to determine which of their crew is the traitor behind this before it's too late. It could be any one of them-- even someone they trust.
Next chapter.]
[The three of them begin together at the airlock, but they're free to take whatever actions they want to fulfill their objective and locate the traitorous crewmate! Their books are effective for this trip only. They have on them any equipment their character would reasonably own, and they have the necessary knowledge to fill their role-- but they all retain their usual memories.]
Starblaster . . . . . 2? Really? No one likes a sequel.
[Taako tilts his head for a second. This is a little hard because he's wearing one of those silly retro space helmets, but it's fine.]
Anyway, this is easy! We just shoot every. Just in case.
[Anyway, Taako will take some initiative! For once. Heading into the coffin cabins, humming as he goes.]
[Taako tilts his head for a second. This is a little hard because he's wearing one of those silly retro space helmets, but it's fine.]
Anyway, this is easy! We just shoot every. Just in case.
[Anyway, Taako will take some initiative! For once. Heading into the coffin cabins, humming as he goes.]
I think it would be way too easy if it were Traitor Dave...
[ She hurries to keep up with them both. ]
Then again, I feel like we'd feel really stupid if we didn't at least check.
[ She hurries to keep up with them both. ]
Then again, I feel like we'd feel really stupid if we didn't at least check.
[Traitor Dave waves to Taako as he heads in! And when Magnus addresses him, he sits up from where he was busy lying on one of the bunks, wiping his sweaty, sweaty brow.
"Yeah, man, I know, it's those space sweats I got from touching a couple of weird plants on that mission... it's probably okay, right? I don't know if space insurance covers that kinda thing."
He shrugs, once again wiping his brow. That's a real sweaty boy right there.
"Anyway, uh, did you guys need something?"]
"Yeah, man, I know, it's those space sweats I got from touching a couple of weird plants on that mission... it's probably okay, right? I don't know if space insurance covers that kinda thing."
He shrugs, once again wiping his brow. That's a real sweaty boy right there.
"Anyway, uh, did you guys need something?"]
[Waving back to sweet, sweet, sweaty Traitor Dave. Taako walks up and puts a hand on one of his sweaty, sweaty shoulders.]
It's our good friend and close confidante, Traitor Dave! I love-- I love this guy. Always with the touching the weird plants and stuff, right? You're such a jokester, Traitor Dave. Always with the betraying and the backstabbing and the double-crossing. Except for us three, your favorite people in the galaxy. That's true loyalty. An affliction that even Space Doctors can't cure.
Um, anyway, bud, have you heard of any treacherous action going around the ship here? Any rumors on the downlow you wanna share with us? Maybe it's Rhonda in Space Accounting, I never trusted her.
It's our good friend and close confidante, Traitor Dave! I love-- I love this guy. Always with the touching the weird plants and stuff, right? You're such a jokester, Traitor Dave. Always with the betraying and the backstabbing and the double-crossing. Except for us three, your favorite people in the galaxy. That's true loyalty. An affliction that even Space Doctors can't cure.
Um, anyway, bud, have you heard of any treacherous action going around the ship here? Any rumors on the downlow you wanna share with us? Maybe it's Rhonda in Space Accounting, I never trusted her.
[Yeah, he instantly loves and supports Traitor Dave as well. He doesn't understand Taako is seducing him, so putting a hand on his other sweaty shoulder.]
It's like I've always said, you have the best intuition for traitors in the galaxy, huh? And also, some kind of problem with your sweat glands. Why don't you tell us who you think the traitor is, in your heart?
It's like I've always said, you have the best intuition for traitors in the galaxy, huh? And also, some kind of problem with your sweat glands. Why don't you tell us who you think the traitor is, in your heart?
[ Escha supports Traitor Dave, but from a distance because she does not want to get sweaty. In fact: ]
Um - you guys probably shouldn't touch him...
[ Then, to Traitor Dave: ] Traitor Dave, you should be in the infirmary. Promise you'll head there, once you've answered our questions?
Um - you guys probably shouldn't touch him...
[ Then, to Traitor Dave: ] Traitor Dave, you should be in the infirmary. Promise you'll head there, once you've answered our questions?
[Traitor Dave abruptly grows three inches taller to comply with Taako's storyline needs. It's fine. He's 6'1" now. Anyway, he looks so pleased with all Taako's compliments, offering him a fist bump for it but not even fussed if Taako leaves him hanging. He's such a good bro that way. He's just vibing here with a hand on each shoulder, totally cool with this.
"Yeah- yeah, you guys totally are my favorite people! And y'know, it's like they always say, you gotta be one to know one, right? Uh, sweaty, I mean. You gotta be sweaty to catch someone else who's... sweaty for totally different reasons."
He nods, apparently satisfied with this, the smoothest of dodges. Everyone knows he's Traitor Dave, but he doesn't admit to it. It's part of his charm, probably.
"I guess you're right, I should probably get this checked out. I mean, the guys in Space Laundry are gonna start getting mad at me. But now that you guys mention it?"
Traitor Dave leans in, holding a hand up to his mouth conspiratorially. He does not lower his voice.
"I definitely don't trust Rhonda in Space Accounting either. She said she had to go do some pilates. Like, what even is that? I think it's a secret code, you guys."]
"Yeah- yeah, you guys totally are my favorite people! And y'know, it's like they always say, you gotta be one to know one, right? Uh, sweaty, I mean. You gotta be sweaty to catch someone else who's... sweaty for totally different reasons."
He nods, apparently satisfied with this, the smoothest of dodges. Everyone knows he's Traitor Dave, but he doesn't admit to it. It's part of his charm, probably.
"I guess you're right, I should probably get this checked out. I mean, the guys in Space Laundry are gonna start getting mad at me. But now that you guys mention it?"
Traitor Dave leans in, holding a hand up to his mouth conspiratorially. He does not lower his voice.
"I definitely don't trust Rhonda in Space Accounting either. She said she had to go do some pilates. Like, what even is that? I think it's a secret code, you guys."]
Oh Dave, don't play coy with me, I know we've had our on-and-off again in the past, because you just can't help your traitorous ways, but in the end you'll always come through for me.
[Patting him on the shoulder. Then wiping off his space glove on his space pants.]
Anyway, pilates is most definitely a cover for some nefarious bullshit. Let's go fuck Rhonda's day up.
[Patting him on the shoulder. Then wiping off his space glove on his space pants.]
Anyway, pilates is most definitely a cover for some nefarious bullshit. Let's go fuck Rhonda's day up.
[Well, now he's feeling competitive? With Taako?]
Yeah, Dave, and I'll never forgot that space laser fight we had at the Best Friends Forever party you threw me. Or that time you died in my arms, but it turned out to be your clone.
[Patting him. And then heading towards the Entertainment Lounge.]
Rhonda! You evil?
Yeah, Dave, and I'll never forgot that space laser fight we had at the Best Friends Forever party you threw me. Or that time you died in my arms, but it turned out to be your clone.
[Patting him. And then heading towards the Entertainment Lounge.]
Rhonda! You evil?
[ Too bad Escha is not nearly as competitive, so she just waves to Traitor-Dave as they move on to the next room. ]
Don't forget to visit the infirmary.
[ ... Magnus. This is all just too direct!! ]
I really don't know if we're going about this in the best way.
Rhonda, do you feel different at all, today?
Don't forget to visit the infirmary.
[ ... Magnus. This is all just too direct!! ]
I really don't know if we're going about this in the best way.
Rhonda, do you feel different at all, today?
[Oh. Dave glances between Taako and Magnus a little confused. "Yeah, you know, those things just kinda happen-- but I'm totally here to come through now! I swear I'm not gonna pull the clone thing on you again either, Mr. Captain Magnus."
He nods to Escha's reminder, too, calling after them as they leave-
"I'll be in the infirmary if you need me! Bye! Love you guys!"
Haha, that Dave. Anyway! They move on to Rhonda from Space Accounting, who is in the middle of her pilates routine. She doesn't answer them at first because she is in the Zone, but then she sighs and turns to face them with a little frown.
"Am I evil? Well, yes, if you ask Traitor Dave, but I keep telling him I'm not Space Payroll."
She considers Escha's question, though.
"Different how? Less relaxed, after having my routine interrupted, but I don't think there's been anything major."]
He nods to Escha's reminder, too, calling after them as they leave-
"I'll be in the infirmary if you need me! Bye! Love you guys!"
Haha, that Dave. Anyway! They move on to Rhonda from Space Accounting, who is in the middle of her pilates routine. She doesn't answer them at first because she is in the Zone, but then she sighs and turns to face them with a little frown.
"Am I evil? Well, yes, if you ask Traitor Dave, but I keep telling him I'm not Space Payroll."
She considers Escha's question, though.
"Different how? Less relaxed, after having my routine interrupted, but I don't think there's been anything major."]
Whatever, Rhonda, you're the one doing Pilates in the middle of the Space Lounge. Other people use this space . . . ?
[Taako's apparently not happy with his Space Paycheck either.]
Have you ever heard of a, what was it? A Groff?
[Taako's apparently not happy with his Space Paycheck either.]
Have you ever heard of a, what was it? A Groff?
It was a Grob.
[ But what kind of an inside joke is that?? Escha still obediently hides obediently behind Magnus. ]
S-should we do something? Lock her up so she can't infect anyone else?
[ But what kind of an inside joke is that?? Escha still obediently hides obediently behind Magnus. ]
S-should we do something? Lock her up so she can't infect anyone else?
["A Groff? Is that what they call it when he spits... no, I'm not sure that's right..."
She's distracted from her brief theatre moment by Magnus' accusation and Escha's backup, though-- her eyes widen a little, a hand pressed to her chest.
"Lock me up-- you can't really think I'm a Grob, can you? Is this one of your inside jokes, Captain Magnus-- Space Escha, please, we've gone to pneumatic-tube brunch together. Could one of them really appreciate the concept of having your order flung to your table in a high-speed tube? They don't like anything that moves too quickly!"]
She's distracted from her brief theatre moment by Magnus' accusation and Escha's backup, though-- her eyes widen a little, a hand pressed to her chest.
"Lock me up-- you can't really think I'm a Grob, can you? Is this one of your inside jokes, Captain Magnus-- Space Escha, please, we've gone to pneumatic-tube brunch together. Could one of them really appreciate the concept of having your order flung to your table in a high-speed tube? They don't like anything that moves too quickly!"]
[Taako refuses to understand the theater joke because I am closing my eyes.]
Hm. You sure about that Rhonda? I would think only a Grob would tell us lies about Grob behavior-- [then he suddenly WHIPS AROUND LIKE HE'S ABLE TO SLAP HER then stops.] Ha-cha!
Hm. You sure about that Rhonda? I would think only a Grob would tell us lies about Grob behavior-- [then he suddenly WHIPS AROUND LIKE HE'S ABLE TO SLAP HER then stops.] Ha-cha!
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